Pardon the lack of content on here...usually when I can think of good things to post I don't have time to type them up, and when I do have the time I've forgotten anything worthwhile.

First off, a good show worth checking out is "Yes Minister", a British comedy I thought I'd give a shot since I rather liked Paul Eddington in "The Good Life". Very clever show...a bit too blasted clever sometimes, and I wish the DVDs had closed captioning, as it can be hard to follow. But a great indictment of office politics (and naturally government politics) and the stonewalling/CYA maneuvers of superfluous bureaucracy. One of the best written shows I've ever seen...can you imagine a show done in America about just three 55-year-old white men working together in an office for government administration? No wacky characters, no crazy situations, just the drudgery of paperwork and meetings. Cheap gags are at a minimum...they have to work for it to be funny, and they succeed at that.

Secondly, both Steely Dan and Michael McDonald were excellent in St Louis on Monday night. Jon Herington, in particular, is a freak of nature. With a guy like that in the band, Walter Becker ought to just sit down when it comes time for a guitar solo. Herington was the closest thing to mind-blowing I've seen in a live guitarist, whereas Becker, well, he does what he does pretty well, but his addiction to bluesy phrasings stuck out like a sore thumb on some songs. He definately has his own voice. But in terms of relatively unknown guitarists, Herington is it. I know this is one of those stupid sayings, but the guy really does reinterpret the original solos. Usually I am disappointed by the live solos, but not with this guy...easily an equal with Carlton and the others, if perhaps a generation late.

I fully intend to "one of these days" sit down and write out all my thoughts on the pacifism debate. It may be a futile intention, but at least I will mention the latest consideration:

Luke 22:36-38
36Then said he unto them, But now, he that hath a purse, let him take it, and likewise his scrip: and he that hath no sword, let him sell his garment, and buy one. 37For I say unto you, that this that is written must yet be accomplished in me, And he was reckoned among the transgressors: for the things concerning me have an end. 38And they said, Lord, behold, here are two swords. And he said unto them, It is enough.

I found this surprising...not least because I'd never seen it before. Wondering how it was traditionally interpreted, I went to several commentaries, and found that the only ones (that I had) that mentioned the passage made unsupported claims that "obviously" this was not meant literally, without even presenting a lucid explanation of what he meant otherwise. Of course that immediately made me think of Python's "blessed are the cheesemakers" line, "obviously it isn't meant to be taken literally, it refers to any manufacturer of dairy products". Its that sort of snivelling contempt for the words of Jesus...that obviously we know what he MEANT to say, never mind what he actually did say. Jesus would not be so ignorant and uneducated as to advise his followers to purchase swords, would he?

There are reams that can be (and have been) written on Jesus' lack of compliance to pacifism, and its very interesting and eye-opening to study it out. It is just very different from the common wisdom that I was taught.

Again, I will flesh this all out and actually support it one of these days, just not today.

One final note...I've got a small copita glass of a Dalmore single malt, and I have to say, malt whisky from Scotland is one of the greatest imbibable inventions to which man can lay claim. They are as varied and as unique as the wines of Europe or California, each region having a distinct style, each distillery having a peculiar trademark, and each blend and bottling having a fingerprint, so to speak. This particular one has a splendid nose of honey, light molasses, and fleeting floral notes...an aroma more complex and varied than I can parse into words. The complexity is particularly amazing when you think the only real ingredients are barley malt and water. I used to think more highly of brandy than of whisky, but with the exception of certain varieties of apple brandy, that has switched. I have to say, I can see no higher purpose for barley.

Cheers to John Barleycorn!

To all those who have left comments on here...

Ummm, yeah. I didn't realize I had comment verification turned on or something, so I had 7 comments, spanning six months (yeah, this is a high traffic blog) that didn't get published. I was not being unresponsive if I neglected to respond to these comments...just unaware that they existed, and all that. Thanks to my wife for pointing out the obvious.

Josh...the Gervais show is a podcast, downloadable (or at least it used to be, you may have to pay for it now) at www.rickygervais.com.

Matt, thanks for the MacDonald link, and no, the commie libs at UMKC didn't put anything in my yard, presumably because they are aware of my intense appreciation of diversity: .303, .38, .45, .223, etc. Muahahaha. Also thanks for the offer of loaning Orthodoxy...I'm immersed in library books regarding English cooking and restaurant planning right now so don't worry about getting it to me right away, but it is something I'd love to read.

Say hello to my little friend...

This is my Kel-Tec PLR-16, a long-range pistol chambered in .223 Remington. It is similar to an AR-15 pistol, but it does not use direct impingement, relying instead on a short stroke piston system. It also does not have the buffer tube the AR pistols typically do. It has been customised to an extent...note the 30 round magazine and the compact foreend with the picatinny rail, both nice upgrades I think. I added a holographic reflex sight, BSA's multi-reticle version, which has worked out great. And most recently, the soft case (on which it is sitting) and the Yankee Hill Machine flash suppressor were given to me by my father-in-law for my birthday...quite nifty. I *could* modify it further with accessories on the underbarrel rail (such as a laser, or a tactical light) but I don't really need that at all. And a vertical foregrip would put this into a restricted class of weapons so I'll happily skip that.

How about a better view of the flash suppressor and reflex sight:

I'm looking to get this back out on the range again soon. It doesn't kick as much as you expect...the weight absorbs a good amount of recoil. Certainly nothing like the recoil you'd expect from something like this:

http://www.serbu.com/shorty.htm

So we went to the lake this last weekend...quite a nice weekend for it too, great weather, not even breaking into the 90s. Of course I brought a fair share of ammunition and put my firearms through their paces. I even fired my PLR-16, which is a .223 AR-15 pistol, at night...that was a treat, quite a flash signature! Also I shot my .45 auto, which confirmed a few things from my last trip to the range. It continuously kept choking on the Remington ball ammo I was feeding it, with probably 2-3 malfunctions per clip of 7 rounds. The two forms of malfunction encountered were same as the last trip, failure to go into battery and failure to extract. I knew what to do this time and could quickly resolve these malfunctions, the first with a light tap to the back of the slide, the latter by locking the slide back, extracting the magazine, racking the slide til the casing is extracted, and reinserting the magazine. However, rereading some manuals leads me to mention a correction in a previous post:

A type II malfunction, the failure to eject or stovepipe malfunction, is not ideally corrected by racking the slide, as I wrote before (and read in a Gabe Suarez book). Because the slide catches on the casing as it is returning forward, it could be that the next round is being chambered, and racking the slide back fully could chamber another round, resulting in a much more frustrating double feed malfunction. The ideal choice here is to curl your support hand over the top of the slide, in front of the ejection port, and sweep your hand backwards, catching the half-ejected casing and pushing it (as well as the slide that is holding it) enough to release it, which will then allow the slide to finish its action and go into battery. Since you aren't racking it all the way back, you won't be in danger of a double feed.

However, I luckily haven't been hit with one of these yet, so I can't say that my method works better in practice. Actually it certainly isn't my method, it's very common...I read it in an Erik Lawrence book, but I'm sure its been around for some time.

I watched "Walk The Line" over the weekend too, and have some strong feelings about the movie. I've never been a huge fan of his music; in my opinion I think people enjoy his style, his character, and those aspects of Johnny Cash more than his music itself. Kind of the same with Bob Dylan, though his are more about the lyrics. But I'm getting off topic. I grew to hate this movie for its message. It made a feeble attempt at justifying Cash's abandonment of his wife, and somehow tried to make his adulterous pursuit of another married (off and on) woman seem "romantic". It may be true to life, and I'm not condemning Cash here, but I'm disgusted how the movie portrays him as cool/admirable/etc. As Sam Miles would say, he was a "butt sniffer". Totally without character or integrity, totally given to whatever he felt he wanted at the time. It is very popular to justify infidelity and divorce with feelings and emotions...his wife "didn't support him or share his dreams", they were emotionally distant, they fell out of love, he and June were soulmates, all that BS. Just like John Lennon and Cynthia Lennon...one reason I never had much respect for Lennon, as an individual (though he had a wicked wit and and amazing musical gift). I've heard this movie defended in that their marriage was "over" by the time he pursued June, but that's respectfully a load of bollocks. A good half of the movie, spanning years, represents the time in which he is chasing one particular skirt and neglecting and dishonoring his wife, still very much married to him and still very much wanting him to be back with her. And all through the movie, they documented countless times when Vivian would desperately work to revive or repair their marriage, but I can't think of any drop of effort made by Cash to make it work.

I feel bad, because I'm not meaning to rag on Cash personally, despite the factual or unfactual nature of the movie, but its more the movie itself and the way it is popularly received that bothers me...that people look with such a flippant eye at the slow degradation of a marriage, the ounce-by-ounce betrayal that is painfully, horribly detailed and documented in this movie. It isn't a love story at all. They at least portrayed June in a more positive light, in that she resisted his advances for a long time and recognized how wrong it was. But like I said, the movie is painful to watch because "romance" is overshadowed and sullied by the terrible slow starvation and death of his first marriage, due to neglect and betrayal. The fact that this is so quickly glossed over and ignored by fans of the movie is what bothers me, that people can easily justify the dissolution of a marriage and the vows that come with it if it just starts to "not feel right" or if something better comes along. The moment you say "I do", you've picked your soulmate, and whoever else comes along, they aren't for you. And did anyone else notice how the Cash character was always doing this kind of lecherous leering thing towards the Carter character?
OK, I'll stop with the crotchety old man thing. It's just one of those things...why do you think 50% of marriages end in divorce? People say it is better to divorce than to lead an unhappy life. I kind of doubt people who try to lead lives of integrity and make every effort to honour their vows to their spouses end up all that unhappy as compared to the people who fly from relationship to relationship down a road paved with infidelity, divorce, and broken promises in pursuit of "happiness". But what do I know, I'm just a 20-something.

[/rant]

Besides, I prefer comedy. Like a romance between Johnny Cash and Jimmy Carter. Think of the giant swimming rabbit jokes that could be made! Oh and that wasn't so much a gay joke as a Jimmy Carter joke, so no offence, pooftas.

Another St. Crispin's dinner is in the works, for August. Perhaps I'll put up a menu, although as our invitees grow more numerous, my dining room is not getting any bigger, so I'm not sure how to handle that, exactly. But so far we've got dishes from Wales and Cheshire for this time. Don't have a deep fryer yet (yet being an operative word) so we'll have to wait a bit longer for fish and chips and Scotch eggs (aka cholesterol cluster bombs, arterial bunker busters, etc).

The Good, the Bad, and the English

Pardon this poorly titled review of two English culinary items, both sampled last night. First off is the bad...blue Stilton. I should have known better, given that the last time I sampled blue cheese (gorgonzola) I found it so disgusting I had to eat random items of food to expel the acrid, moldy taste from my mouth. Likewise, I found this cheese to be eminently inedible. There are those who love it, who sings its praises, who unjustly crown it "King of English Cheeses". To me, I'll stick with the venerable Cheddar, which in its aged and mature form is quite complex and delicious. Other great cheeses include Wensleydale (a new favorite), Cheshire, and Double Gloucester.

But onto the good...Cheshire Pork and Apple Pies. I diced up a pound of lean pork, added a couple diced rashers of bacon, and seasoned the mixture with salt, pepper, a healthy amount of sage, and a dosage of cream sherry to moisten. Then I diced up two Braeburn apples (I'd have rather had Cox's Orange Pippin, I'm sure, but hey, I'm stateside, and these are good apples) and rolled out two pastry crusts. I layered the pork alternately with layers of apples, and then finally dotted the top layer with a tablespoon or so of butter. I drizzled a tiny bit of apple brandy over each one (just, well, because) and folded the pastry over on itself and sealed it. Brushed it with beaten egg to glaze and vented the top with a knife...then into the oven for an hour.

It was quite good! Very interesting, a definite change of pace from other meat pies, most of which have a formula predominantly of beef/lamb, onion, and potatoes or other veg. I might go a little bit easier on the sage next time, and maybe sweeten the apples with a dusting of brown sugar, but on the whole it was great. Another obscure discovery of English cooking. Cheers to my wife for putting up with the experimentation.

Discourse on Randomly Selected Topics

First off, Henry V remains firmly the greatest of Shakespeare's works...challenged in my view only by Hamlet and Richard III. Henry V on the surface appears to be a simple patriotic history, but what a great play it is. Cheers to Lucian Cannole and the rest of the cast in the KC Shakespeare festival. All did a great job. I'll address what I think were the strengths and weaknesses, in comparison to Kenneth Branaugh's cinematic version, which I hold in high regard. Henry V in the stage version does well and seems very reminiscent of Branaugh, but the one area he lacks is due to the nature of stage performance. He doesn't get to cooly whisper lines with "hard favour'd rage" on his brow, the subtlety and self-control that Branaugh's character showed (thanks to closeups and good audio, luxuries the stage version lacked by nature) was one of my favourite things about it. Exeter, as well, had a kind of John Rhys Davies sort of authority as he was cast in the movie. The scene where Exeter addresses the French council in a full suit of armor and thunders his message...again, with some subtlety and a certain awing sense of bridled power...was excellent. "Scorn and defiance...slight regard...contempt..." And lastly, you just can't really upstage Derek Jacobi as Chorus. He put an almost comical amount of energy into that performance. The stage actor did well, too, but Jacobi had a fierce, visceral intensity that befits the seriousness of the play. Now, on the other hand...I think the "ethnic" portion of the play (Welsh, Scotch, Irish, and lower class English) had loads of great actors. The Welsh captain Llewellyn was particular excellent ("aye, leeks is good!"). And Captain Jamie, of course...played by Mr. Cannole quite well. But on the whole, I think you get more of an authentic Shakespeare experience with the staged version. A movie version offers a great many advantages and I admit I tend to prefer them (Gibson's Hamlet being another favourite of mine...and try as a I might I have never really liked Lawrence Olivier versions). But you get the feeling you are at a traditional play when they cast off the luxuries of movie sets, special effects, and the like.

Plans are progressing for an English brewpub in Kansas City. My responsibilities will be creative direction for the food, atmosphere, and all aspects of brewing. The financial and managerial tasks I will leave to my associate. But I am working aggressively to expand my repertoire of British cuisine and enhance my brewing techniques. Perhaps in the not too distant future there will be a place for you to watch the BBC while enjoying bangers and mash and a pint of freshly brewed bitter. Trust me, bangers and mash and a pint of bitter is a lot better than you might assume. I've had the real stuff at an expat joint in LA.

Next...firearms safety, and a discussion of autoloader malfunctions. First the four basic rules of gun safety:

1. Treat every gun as if it were loaded. Additionally, always check the chamber carefully before considering the gun "safe" or unloaded.

2. Muzzle Discipline: never let your muzzle cover anything you are not willing to destroy.

3. Be sure of your target and what is beyond it. Never shoot at shadows, and always realize that bullets can penetrate quite a lot, including interior walls (easily).

4. Keep your finger off the trigger and outside of the trigger guard until on target and ready to fire.

Next up, a discussion of typical autoloader malfunctions. I've experienced a few of these lately and as such have investigated them a bit.

First, failure to go into battery. This means that the bolt has cycled but failed to fully bring the next round into battery, and the symptoms are that the slide doesn't fully close and the trigger is inactive. Simple fix...strike the back of the slide to send it fully into battery. Had two of these but I treated them as duds (type I malfunction and racked the cartridge out of the gun).

Second, a Type I malfunction, failure to fire. Hammer falls and gun does not fire. It is best to hold for 30 seconds to ensure that it isn't a retarded primer, but then you tap the magazine to ensure it is fully seated, rack the slide to eject the dud and chamber a new round, and get back on target to resume firing.

Third, a Type II malfunction, failure to eject, or the "Stovepipe". This happens when a casing gets caught by the returning slide as it was ejecting, jamming the gun. Simple fix, similar to the Type I. Rack the slide back while simultaneously turning the gun to the side, throwing or dropping the spent casing clear, release the slide, and fire.

Fourth, the dreaded Type III, failure to feed/failure to extract. A spent casing fails to extract out of battery and the slide tries to chamber a new round, causing a double feed jam. I had one of these, and the important thing to remember (it took me 3 minutes to figure this out) is to immediately, before doing anything else, lock the slide open. Then remove the magazine (you might have to slide the half-fed cartridge back into the magazine to get it out). Then rack the slide at least twice to eject the spent cartridge...then put in the magazine securely and rack the slide, and you're ready again to fire. This one had me flummoxed, but at least now having dealt with it, I understand it fairly well. Better to be flummoxed by a jam on the range than under a God-forbid situation of extreme circumstances. But this is a tricky one to fix and I'll admit, its a good reason why people should either have a backup gun, or consider the slower firing but more reliable revolver. Autoloaders are excellent machines but they require more dedication, training, and maintenance than a simple double action revolver. Someone who doesn't know how to rapidly and safely address the potential malfunctions listed above should probably stay away from them. They are like racehorses...excellent performance but slightly finicky and jumpy, requiring an expert handler. At this point, anyone considering a firearm for home defense would be best served in my view by a medium frame double action .357 Magnum, or a 12 gauge pump action like a Mossberg 500 or Remington 870.

I've got to step up my dry fire drills, I think, as my marksmanship is a long way from what it needs to be, and I need to smooth out things like my draw/presentation considerably. I'm not sure how I feel about controversial topics such as point shooting. I've read avid praise of it, and ever so much more passionate criticism of it as well. I lean towards the "always use your sights" persuasion, because simply getting a hit will not stop an attacker necessarily, and as has been said before, the three principles of stopping power are marksmanship, marksmanship, and marksmanship. But on the other hand, sometimes you aren't given the luxury of extra time, in the case of a closing-within-arms-length attacker.

I have of late created what I think might be the best beverage I've ever run across. In Normandy there is a drink called "Pommeau de Normand". Normandy is famous for its fermented cider, as well as calvados, its oak-aged apple brandy. Pommeau is an almost equal blend of young apple brandy and fresh, sweet, unfermented apple cider/juice. The brandy preserves the juice, which is typically in the 17% to 20% ABV range. I simulated this hard to find beverage by blending a glass of Martinellis Sparkling Apple Cider (which I have found to be the most flavourful of sweet apple juices I have tried) with Laird's Straight Apple Brandy. The resultant beverage was extraordinary, full of complexity and flavour. Butterscotch, vanilla, floral notes, and of course crisp apple...very unique! I'll be blending and bottling some more of this, definately.

Just watched an interesting show, courtesy Netflix...season one of Mr. Show, from way back in 1995. Very silly (and rather profane) show, but it has its funny moments. David Cross is one of the funniest men alive though I'd venture to say he is funnier as Tobias Fuenke. The show is shockingly derivative of Monty Python's Flying Circus (I say shockingly because I had no idea such a show could snare a modern audience) but I don't slight them on that since I rather like Python.

I'm experimenting with Danish cooking now. Perhaps inspired from my many trips to Solvang, California (sort of a touristy "Little Denmark"...I highly recommend the trip, nonetheless).

My last blog entry bemoaned the confusion surrounding caliber dimensions. Reading up on the 357 Sig cartridge I found out that no, 9mm does not equal a .38 caliber, more like a .355 caliber. Why then is .380 ACP called 9mm Kurz? Is .380 ACP really .355 ACP? .40SW equals approximately 10mm, I can accept that...but this 9mm range of calibers from 357 Mag to 38 Special to 9mm Parabellum, I'm quite confused on. Is there a single, actual .38 cartridge out there? Do I care? Sadly, yes. I do. It's the Schrute in me. "The Schrutes produce very thirsty babies." Sorry for the Dwight quote, I couldn't help myself.

I started (and finished) reading Massad Ayoob's "In the Gravest Extreme" last night, a seminal work in the area of firearms self-defence. Probably the best book on firearms in general I've ever read, even if it is (substantially) dated information. He talks about the "9 m/m" caliber like a fancy new invention from Germany! But I would recommend this to any and every gun owner. It is a sobering and reasoned examination of the ramifications of carrying or owning a weapon, and it forces the reader to consider hard questions that would be much better decided now than when life is on the line. Too many people think of a gun as a magical item imparting an aura of safety around the owner, and they give little thought to what they would do exactly were they forced to deploy it.

How's this for nerdliness: I'm going to make a crappy simulation of ballistic gelatin. Ballistic gelatin is a form of (duh) gelatin that is made do the density of the human body, and cartridges are fired into it to examine penetration, fragmentation, and wound channel size. It allows for a good comparison of terminal ballistics of various bullet calibers and styles. It also looks cool, I admit, which is the real reason I may attempt this. Basically I'm just going to mix up plastic milk containers full of jello (made to a thick consistency) and chill it, then blast it to kingdom come, and hope that it captures some bullets before they exit the other side. It would be awesome to get a perfectly expanded jacketed hollowpoint, even just to explain to people what the point of a hollowpoint is (because yeah...a LOT of people sure do ask me about that stuff...right...).

On the cooking front I've been interested in Asian foods, doing a lot of noodle dishes here recently. I like Thai rice noodles rather a lot, I've been cooking them and vegetables with pad thai sauces, curry sauces, and peanut sauces, all with a shot of Sriracha chili/garlic sauce for some blistering heat. If I ever do start that British brewpub, I'll be supplementing the good old Brit favourites with colonial tastes...chicken curry or tikka masala from India, and perhaps a Burmese/Thai noodle dish with lots of fiery chilies. That would go rather nicely with a malty, sweetish Southern England brown ale, I think. No fizzy pisswater lager allowed! Perhaps in October we could brew an honorary Oktoberfest Maerzen-style, but other than that, the lightest thing on the menu will be Bitter!

Two, at most three things remain on my "to get" list of guns for practical purposes. Note these are not "toys" like some guns might be...things to take to the range and have fun shooting with. I admit my last purchase, a Kel-Tec PLR-16, may have bordered on that, being basically designed as a weapon to be deployed against hordes of zombies. The first is a lightweight carry pistol, such as the planned-to-acquire Kel-Tec PF9. An HK USP Tactical would be "fun" but too expensive and impractical for anything but open carry. The second is that most trusty and proven home defence weapon, the 12-gauge shotgun. My plan would be to acquire a Mossberg 590 with ghost ring sights and retrofit it with a pistol grip and folding stock. Finally, and more optionally, would be a simple modern rifle with long range optics and a moderately powerful caliber, 7.62 NATO or higher. No there aren't many (any?) self-defence scenarios when you would need a long-distance rifle, but say I wanted to go hunting with the lads? Likewise, the Mossberg could double as a hunting weapon, though it would be comical to fire birdshot out of scary black folding-stock shotgun replete with tactical accessories. Kind of like hunting deer with an M82A1 Barrett .50 cal sniper rifle. Insert obligatory "go ahead Bambi make my day" joke here.

OK, one last gun-geek note. Is anybody else pissed that they named the .38 Special a .38 Special? Apparently the .38 Special is NOT in fact of a caliber of .38, as one would assume. I was always confused, because a revolver chambered in .357 Magnum can shoot .38 Special. Turns out, the .38 Special is actually .357. It's a bloody .357 Special if you ask me. Here I was thinking that a .38 Special was a rimmed, revolver version of a 9mm round. Just for clarification, the .380 Auto round, or 9mm Kurz, is 9mm x 17. 9mm Parabellum, the ubiquitous round known simply as "9mm", is 9mm x 19. I was thinking .38 Special was 9mm with a longer case than that, basically a juiced up 9mm. How wrong I was. The misleading bastards!

Ahoy there...

Barely managed to drag meself into work this morning...spent all last night (from 4:30, directly after work, til about 11:00) brewing a mild ale so I'm a bit tired...brewing is a relatively active hobby. For the uninitiated a mild ale is an old English style that resembles a brown ale in its emphasis on dark malts instead of hops, but with a light body and a very small alcohol content. I'm going to bottle this in the smaller 12oz bottles so I can perhaps have a bottle at mealtime when I'd prefer to minimize the consumption of alcohol. I suppose this belongs on my brew log, not my main blog, right?

I've been having some fun with an Airsoft pistol. It's a Beretta 92 clone. All I can say is, man, why didn't they have stuff like this when I was a kid? But it's nice to be able to sit on the couch and fire across the room into my cardboard target trap (making reasonably small groupings, I might add) while watching TV. Cheaper and easier than going to the range, although I of course recognize we're talking apples and oranges.

I watched the NBC Office marathon last night, which is a great show if not on the atmospheric level of the UK version. I think everyone is supposed to think of themselves as Jim and Pam, the normal, fun characters. What's funny is that my wife and I end up sharing a comic assortment of some of the MILDER qualities of another "couple" on the show, that of Dwight and Angela. No I have never dressed up as a Sith Lord before you jump to conclusions. But seriously, I built model tanks as a kid, I can discuss small arms tactics with confidence and interest, and I am a stickler for abiding by rules...in general. Am I Dwight Schrute? Perhaps. QUESTION: what is the point of this post anyway?

Behold the mighty Schrute Space:

http://blogs.nbc.com/office/

Tactical Rantings:

So watching a few TV shows...I've got some issues. First off is 24. Of all TV shows it is the most faithful to proper tactics and firearms training, but here are two issues. In season 2 which I am watching courtesy Netflix right now Jack shoots a thin young woman in her arm to get her to drop a gun. Jack, who never seems to carry anything but a medium frame automatic, may in fact be an excellent shot but no one trusts a sidearm to have that kind of accuracy, or at least no one should. I realize he needed to take her alive, but that's why he needed a 12 gauge with less-than-lethal rubber slugs or something. But I can forgive that. The other issue, which is also somewhat understandable from a TV show standpoint, is that for some crazy reason, he is always the first to enter hostile environments...which in itself is unlikely...and he does so never equipped with the body armour, helmet, ballistic face shield, and M4 carbine that all the other members of the assault team have. I'm sorry, but he should at least take an MP5 if he's going to go point on every single entry on the show. But I am grateful for this, they actually look like they've been trained on their weapons. Jack readily assumes the Weaver stance on a weekly basis and I did see him use the Harries technique once. None of this one-handed garbage.

Speaking of, I don't watch this show, but it is the feminine equivalent of 24...Alias. If I watched it (I've seen snippets) I could probably write reams about how it is unrealistic, so I should probably not open that box anyway. I doubt people expect realism from it. But the TV advert for it showed the heroine holding a large frame automatic with one hand, aimed at a target (presumably not the broad side of a barn...which would most likely be a challenge for her). Pardon my nerdliness as I emit a guffaw and a "yeah right". I don't care how much you train, one handed shooting will always be a fraction as accurate as a properly supported two handed stance, like the Weaver. It's a bloody fashion shoot, that show. Which reminds me of another (funnier) advert showing Wes Anderson, for a credit card company...the money quote was "can you put a bayonet on a .357?".

And lastly, last night's episode of Desperate Housewives. Admittedly the last place you'd expect to see accurate portrayal of CQB or SWAT tactics, but the final scene where the young killer guy has the mother (Bree, yes, I know most of the character names, I will admit that) at gunpoint...he's using a one handed stance but its at close range and you expect an untrained thug to do just that anyway. But when the SWAT team takes him out, apparently with an M4 carbine through the window, it gets a little trickier. First off, you don't hear the shot...totally unlikely, they didn't have silenced weapons and even if they had them off camera no one would put it on a sniper rifle for SWAT purposes. Secondly, the suspect was hit and made no immediate physical recognition of the hit...no jerking, no reflex, no jolt upon impact...highly unlikely. When a 5.56mm FMJ bullet strikes you in the chest, I would see it as highly unlikely that you'd stand stone still, then realize you've been hit, then fall down. And lastly, they went for a chest cavity shot. Unlikely...he was pulling the double action trigger and the chamber was cycling, with the hammer raising. The only way to stop that suspect was a careful shot to the cranio-ocular cavity. A shot to the chest would have a very likely reflexive action that would complete the shot.

OK, enough ranting, back to work.

Hello lads I'm back for another post of generally ponderous and shallow drivel. Let's start with the more intellectual crap and move on to the unimportant banter (saving the best for last).

C.S. Lewis has always been one of my favourite writers and lately I ran across a very interesting article regarding his views on pacifism. All the more interesting as I was having an internal debate (and still am, as a matter of fact) on acceptable use of force, and moral implications of both self-defence and defence of innocents for a Christian. It is a complicated subject, to say the least. C.S. Lewis as always has seemingly radical views that shock you at first (such as the thought that killing should be neither loved nor hated...you'd have to have context for this, honestly). There is a lot to consider in this area, and I've heard good arguments from what I would call "semi-pacifists" that I don't consider to be incorrect or anything, but while their particular philosophy (which I'm not going to take the time to spell out) works under many situations there are some situations that I think they would either act differently or perhaps be morally at fault for not doing so. All very, very complex. Let's put it this way...a guy has a gun on you, you have the capacity to draw and take him down. The argument would be, you are
going to heaven, you don't know about him, so your life is a fair sacrifice. That is fair. When you start to talk about home invasions, and the threat of death or worse to your family, things get a bit dicier. An innocent on the street about to be murdered, when you have the capacity to draw your weapon and intervene, or simply look away and walk on. What would the Christian do in that case? What is the selfless act, and what is the selfish act? Lewis makes an interesting case
regarding killing, and the difference between murder and killing. If a woman desperately fights off a man attempting to rape her, and he is pushed back, strikes his head on a rock and dies, she has killed him. Or if you're going to say "that's an accident" let's change it slightly...a woman about to be raped at knifepoint, grabs a rock off the ground and strikes her attacker on the head, killing him. Has she sinned? She committed an act of violence and killed a man, albeit in the most dire of self-defence situations. There are countless scenarios that could be presented, but enough with my one-way internal debate.

24 is a very tense show. I would not recommend that anyone purchase the DVD sets, because if I had all of the DVDs at one time I would stay up a very very long time and stay home from work, and probably start to hallucinate. I'd also start to believe that I worked for CTU and that President Palmer had authorized me to hunt down Sayed Ali and dispatch him. Just not safe, hehe. But one thing that cracks me up is how women are portrayed on the show, in two areas...the IT workers, and the terrorists. The IT workers are comically mostly women, which is almost exactly the opposite of the real world. Computer techs and specialists tend to be geeky left-brain guys, and we all know this. I grant you that Chloe is a funny and worthwhile character to have on the show, but all of the rest of them, its just a bit unlikely. And the other part is the "femme fatale" thing they have going through the series. Each season has at least one twenty-something American woman who apparently is a trained, heartless, and ruthlessly efficient killer-for-hire. How many twenty-something American women do you know who have even fired a pistol before, I ask? I can vouch for at least one, my wife, but the generally the only interest she has in guns is a sweetly sympathetic interest to share with her husband. Am I a chauvinistic bigot? If you say so. But I'm just being realistic. I'm not saying anything bad about women; in general women tend to be less interested in combat, violence, and using terrorism to accomplish political goals. Obviously there are exceptions but in 24 it is more the rule than the exception. Oh well, its just a show.

Still haven't taken my Kel-Tec out...maybe this Sunday? I should get some more ammo for it. I need to clean it fully before getting it out there. I broke it down and reassembled it, which is ridiculously painless in comparison to field-stripping a 1911 or my Ruger .22 MkII. The Kel-Tec PF9 looks good too...an extraordinarily small and lightweight 9mm handgun. Single-stack, it holds 7 rounds in the mag and 1 in the chamber. Double action only. Weighs about 1 lb (16oz) fully loaded, 13oz unloaded.

And lastly, Chicago II is a great album. Musicians don't do work like this any more. I'm sorry, I know it isn't the proper thing to say, but I'm not going to couch it in the premises of preference or evolving styles or any of that...modern music is lackluster, hit-and-mostly-miss garbage with sporadic moments of at least mediocre quality music. And it isn't just the music styles...musicians today just suck in comparison. Name a single guitarist played on modern rock radio who had the chops of Terry Kath. Or a bassist as good as Peter Cetera. YES THAT PETER CETERA. If you get outplayed by a guy who did a DUET with AMY GRANT what does that say about you. I mean, even though we are talking about the same guy who sang "You're the Inspiration"...he can hit the groove hard on the bass and lock in with a drummer, without being locked in to a song structure. "It Better End Soon", "I'm a Man", virtually anything of the first several Chicago albums, its all a showcase of some excellent bass chops. And let's get right down to it, you snivelling talentless hacks whose greatest musical achievement so far was learning a few Weezer songs from online tablature...you wouldn't know a groove if it was wedged up yer arse, sodding wankers. *ahem* No, but let's have some exemptions. The Chili Peppers definately have chops...they are a modern day AC/DC, good chops, good sound, but not too innovative and they tend to sound the same on each song. Radiohead was marginally technically gifted but only in comparison to the morons that surrounded them. They can play but they avoid anything too challenging (and then claim that choice to be motivated by artistic sensibility and not by technical limitations). Cake is good, they know how to groove and balance creativity and instrumental ability very well, and above all they don't take themselves too seriously (one would assume). The bassist who played with Ben Folds reminded me of my own style, due to his notey playing and use of fuzz. Maybe we both dug Chris Squire?

If you wanted to know who the REAL musicians were, take away the stages, take away fans who knew your names and your songs, take away all hopes and aspirations for success, recognition, and even the possibility that anyone would take the time to listen to your music. Strip all of that away, and you'd find untold numbers of musicians, particularly rock musicians, walking away. But jazz musicians...real jazz musicians...there is something about the way a guy who has unbelievable skill can sit in the corner of a restaurant with a small combo and groove and play these mind-blowing things that everyone else in the room just thinks of as "background music". No recognition, nothing. He's not going to get a record deal. He does it because his instrument is his voice (and for singers the reverse is true). I don't know, I'm a rocker by nature but I get so tired of the gigantic ego stuff that is pretty much the petrol in the tank of the rocknroll bus. To all the musicians I've ever known, I quote the aforementioned Radiohead: "ambition makes you look pretty ugly".

But even that stuff doesn't interest me all that much. Musicians ought to be free to do what floats their flotilla, I admit.

We have reached the end of my rant.

I'm reading a number of tactical handgun defence books right now...tomorrow I'm taking a CCW course in Platte City. I've noted that firearms/self-defence authors tend to be comically opinionated, egotistical, and entirely dismissive of any views other than their own. However, they still have a lot of good points, and I tend to take all of their advice with a grain of salt and use what I can. No use becoming an acolyte of some particular instructor (although I've found myself generally in accord with Gabriel Suarez) and then dismiss the valuable teachings of other instructors. Sometimes unfortunately I get very mixed information...one teacher recommends the Harries technique for holding a handgun and flashlight, another dismisses it offhand as a foolish technique taught by inexperienced organizations (without clarification of its purported flaws).

The books can be humorous in their frankness though...an example is from the current book I'm reading (name and author escape my memory): "Chapter Eleven: Shooting Into Vehicles and Shooting From Vehicles". As horrible as that sounds, it did contain some very useful pieces of information that are better to know beforehand than to learn the hard way (in one of those God-forbid type scenarios).

While the quote down below (attributed on the net as being from Mark Twain, but I've not seen that substantiated) retains the much-sought-after position of My Current Favourite Quote, here's another good (if a bit sad) quote:

"Shoot straight, you bastards, don't make a mess of it!" - Leftenant Harry Morant, calling out a final request to his firing squad before shuffling off this mortal coil and joining the choir invisible.

Well, I borrowed a cheap digital camera to let you see my happy family of firearms:

On top is my circa-1918 Lee Enfield SMLE No1MkIII...for the uninformed this was the standard battle rifle for the Brits for a long time (although during WWII it was a slightly modified variant, the No4). 10 rounds of British 303 with a surprisingly smooth bolt. Shame you can't see the Wilkinson bayonet in the photo...its a huge saber style bayonet, very beautiful.

Lower left, that's my Llama M1911 copy, chambered in (what else) .45ACP. Always on duty for home defence. A good gun, and after a thorough cleaning and oiling, a very nice, smoothly operating pistol. Lots of power, and fun to shoot.

Next is my wife's old Smith and Wesson .38 Special snubnose. 6 round cylinder loaded with hollowpoint currently. I keep this one....close.

Next is that beautiful new addition to the family, the Kel-Tec PLR-16. 30 round capacity of 5.56 NATO rifle ammunition, it's a big beast as you can see. For those times when "enough" just isn't enough.

Lastly, my first handgun, the Ruger MkII. A nice little .22LR plinker pistol, very accurate if unsuitable for defensive handgun purposes. A great way to have an inexpensive day at the range (22 rimfire ammo is ridiculously cheap).

Upcoming additions will most likely be first an ultra-concealable, sub-compact 9mm single-stack automatic (Kel-Tec PF9, most likely) for licensed carry, and eventually a tactical shotgun...the Mossberg 590 for extra home defence firepower.

Favourite Quote of the Moment:

"I like my beer dark, cigars strong, coffee black, bourbon straight, and politicians on the end of a rope." --Mark Twain

My gun collection is growing. Got the Kel-Tec, and a big mammajamma it be, most definately. I also snagged a nice Brit 30 round mag in black...although burning through that would cost somewhere around 7 bucks with the ammo I bought (WWB). I'm not sure when I'll get to fire it because I'm so blasted busy, but perhaps down at the lake in the next several weeks (where rapid fire isn't grounds for getting kicked off the range!).

Here is what I plan on adding to it. First the fore-end, depicted in the previous post. That gives you a solid grip on the front for firing SMG-style. Also adds a lower rail. Then, a Phantom (YHM 5C1) flash suppressor, to lessen the huge muzzle blast and recoil this thing will have. Then, a red-dot sight. For rapid aiming and low-light environments this will be priceless. Finally, for the lower front rail, a laser dot sight, which allows you to shoot from the hip. I always think about guns in the tactical environment of my house, which realistically is the only place they would ever be used for anything but target practice, and these mods would give me advantages and flexibility in one of those "God forbid" situations. Is it overkill, you ask, when a simple revolver or 12 gauge is the accepted home defence system for most people? Perhaps, but I don't really care about overkill and the last thing I'm going to do is play fair if someone invades my home and threatens my wife and me. And my kitty (said in an Eric Cartman voice, of course). My active assumption if someone breaks into my house is that they are elite and well-equipped professionals (which I grant is highly unlikely) and therefore I'm prepared to use whatever force I have at my disposal to counter them. I suppose you could take it to extremes. An M249 would be a little excessive for a home defence weapon, as would a crate of frag grenades.

Right now I've just got FMJ ammo, which I'll use for target practice, but due to the lower muzzle velocity of the PLR (a result of the short barrel) I'll pick up some hollowpoint eventually, and fill a mag to have at the ready for the home defence scenario. Still got my S&W 38Spl snubnose, as well as my Spanish 1911 copy. I love that 1911...I field stripped it and spent a whole evening cleaning and oiling it. The slide is smooth and crisp now. Ready to launch a clip worth of .45 caliber lead at a moment's notice. I've only fired it a few times but it has never jammed or failed on me. The Ruger MkII is, well, a pretty target pistol and a fun plinker, that's about it. But I like it! Extraordinarily accurate. The Enfield, which I also stripped and cleaned, is as always, a beautiful old gun with a lot of class. I may mount it in my dining room. Next to the javolina head that I don't have.

I'm still pondering the ideal concealed carry weapon. The Kel-Tec P3AT weighs in at a ridiculous 7 ounces, and I held one at the gun store (insanely small!). The other one I'd consider is a Bersa Thunder 380, which is admittedly heavier but would fit my hand nicer and be a bit more accurate...it doesn't matter how lightweight the gun is if it can't put steel on target. Oh well, one gun at a time. Me and my hobbies...

OK we're done posting about Donald Fagen for now, I promise.

Anyway...long-time readers (depressingly hilarious, innit?) will recall my quest for firepower and selecting the perfect "next gun". I've been back and forth on this quite a bit, eventually settling on a FAL, but I found something else in the meantime. The Kel-Tec PLR-16. Essentially take the AR-15 design, use a different gas piston system, shorten the barrel substantially and remove the stock. What remains is a 5.56mm pistol with a 30 round capacity, tons of power, capable of being outfitted with red dot sights, laser sights, you name it. I'll be getting mine next week. I know a lot of you may think to yourselves..."5.56mm vs. 9mm? That's a smaller and assumedly less powerful caliber!" Au contraire my friends. That's why the US military has been using 5.56 ammunition in all of its rifles and infantry-carried machine guns since the 70s. The bullet may be smaller but the power behind it is much greater, being a rifle round. Think of a 9mm round as a large rock fired from a sling shot, and 5.56mm as a small bolt fired from a powerful crossbow. The gun doesn't quite hit full AR-15 muzzle velocities due to the shorter barrel but if I recall correctly it does hit around 2600 fps. Anyway, here it is:


So but anyway....yeah. I'm looking forward to taking this baby to the range. It's a noisy sucker. I just have to wait until next Monday to get my handgun purchase permit from the Jackson County sheriff.

I'm still in a bit of a trance from Donald Fagen's latest album; it's a bit unfair to compare it to a classic like The Nightfly, but the astonishing clarity of Fagen's lyrics has a bit of a hold on me. It's almost as if he grew tired of the ruse, and stopped trying to camoflauge the meaning behind the songs. One particular song was rather disquieting..."Brite Nitegown", a tight, creepy funk number. Fagen's explanation of the song in the liner notes made it quite disturbing:

"I read in a biography of W.C Fields that the great comedian liked to refer to
Death as "the fellow in the bright nightgown". Each verse is a different
encounter with the Fellow."

I've always been quite fond of W.C. Fields and his movies, and his imagination of a man in a bright nightgown is...well, disturbing but yet difficult to envision. You can't quite picture what he imagines, but it holds a kind of grotesque normalcy. Nothing exotic like a demon or a fearsome reaper, just a fellow in a (perhaps glowing?) nightgown. I suppose the most horrible thought along those lines is that none of us would really know what the Fellow would look like, and the moment we do...he's here and our time is up. So with that quasi-ghoulish premise, here are the lyrics:

I dreamed I had a fever
I was pushin one-oh-three
My mom’s all upset - cryin’ by my bedside
Everybody’s prayin’ for me
I hear a scratchin at the window
I somehow twist myself around
I realize
I’m eyes to eyes
With the fella in the Brite Nitegown

Brite Nitegown
Brite Nitegown
You can’t fight with the fella
In the Brite Nitegown

The eagle flys on Friday
My baby wants to bash
I hit the ATM - and march down the street
With a roll of party cash
Right then a couple lit-up brothers
They gently put me on the ground
They do the steal
Leave me to deal
With the fella in the Brite Nitegown

Brite Nitegown
Brite Nitegown
You can’t fight with the fella
In the Brite Nitegown

Ten milligrams of Chronax
Will whip you back through time
Past Hebrew kings - and furry things
To the birth of humankind
I shared in all of nature’s secrets
But when I finally came around
I’m sittin’ on the rug
Gettin’ a victory hug
From the fella in the Brite Nitegown

Brite Nitegown
Brite Nitegown
You can’t fight with the fella
In the Brite Nitegown

Donald Fagen Returns

So Donald Fagen is back with his third solo album (first one in thirteen years), "Morph the Cat". Having listened to a portion of the album, its replete with complex, appealing grooves and jazzified harmonic progressions. Listen to "H Gang" for example. Classic Donald Fagen material, a nice bookend to the trilogy. Also check out his other two albums, "Kamakiriad" and "The Nightfly", the latter being an especially enduring classic.

Certain bands have a unique way of motivating me in music; if I listen to the great mass of modern popular music in just about every genre, I get a bit frustrated at the plainness, the boring cookie-cutter progressions, and the utter lack of impressive musicianship. It ironically makes me less interested in playing music when the music I hear wouldn't challenge me at all...people are getting paid, actually PAID to recycle this drivel and that depresses me a bit...

Then I listen to Steely Dan or Yes, and I realize, wow, I could focus entirely on my playing for ten years and not have the chops to hang with these guys. Knowing there is something beyond power chords and distortion keeps me interested.

Awesome grooves though, this is a great record...can't wait to get my actual copy (right now he's streaming lofi versions on his website, donaldfagen.com).

Cheers mates.

K A R L P I L K I N G T O N

So, I hope you've all discovered the Ricky Gervais show. It's almost as if Ricky Gervais himself has caused his own demise as the hot new comedic entity by giving the limelight to Karl. Karl Pilkington exudes a unique fusion of childish ignorance with adult cynicism that is as fiendishly comical as it is psychologically debilitating. He isn't Gareth...he possesses none of the gnawing self-doubt and insecurity of Mr. Keenan, on the contrary....Karl is strangely secure...secure in his supremely uncurious and sated expressions, secure in the veracity of his sweeping observations of the world around him, and secure in himself, as odd as that might appear.

Karl wouldn't wonder, as "Garrettio" did, whether there would ever be a boy born that could swim faster than a shark. He would simply muse on the futility of swimming in the ocean at all. There aren't any sharks on land.

Cobblers, toffeeshops, knob-at-night remixes, and Monkey News....Karl, we salute you and your great spherical noggin!

"...alright...."

OK, a lot of things have been going on, but one minor detail of the whole situation that strikes me as incredibly ironic...

First up is my recent article arguing for the confirmation of Sam Alito in the UMKC student newspaper (just some crap I threw together, nothing great or original):

Examining the Merits of Alito

Then, I find out yesterday that Alito made national headlines on his first day by breaking with Roberts, Scalia, and Thomas, voting to extend the stay of execution for Michael Taylor. The whole situation seems surreal, hitting national news, not something I am used to, personally, but I'm a newcomer to the family. If you (anyone?) think of it, pray for the Harrisons.

CNN article on the case

But yeah, that's it. I'm sure I'll be back to the same old useless patter and silliness you've grown to know and love in the next post.