So I got up the day before the conference at something like 03:30, swigged down an iced coffee, and having prepared assiduously the night before, was out on the road by 03:45. The drive up to the airport was mostly inconsequential...I recall thinking the odd temple off of 435 looked even more impressive at night illuminated (I have since finally looked it up, and it is the conventional LDS temple in the area...as opposed to the RLDS temple in Independence). I did notice that my front hood was unlatched on the drive up...thankfully stayed hooked at least and didn't fly up on the highway. Who knows how long its been like that...I've only been driving this particular car on side streets for probably months or more.
Got to the new airport terminal, and for the first time in my life, parked near the terminal, like I owned the place. I was only going to be gone for a few days, and the company was paying...and it was 4am, so, yeah. I at least parked in the slightly cheaper surface lot, vs the garage. A quick walk into the terminal from there. The new airport looks, and I mean this as a compliment...almost exactly like every other airport. As opposed to the weird eccentricity of our old airport, we've embraced the efficiency of conformity.
"It can hardly be a coincidence that no language on Earth has ever produced the expression 'as pretty as an airport'." -Douglas Adams
Security was quick enough (quicker in the future with TSA Precheck, hopefully). Lots of superfluous art installations to block the flow of traffic for weary travellers and plenty of local restaurants who were likely failing out in the real world and decided to see if they could turn a profit with the captive audience inside security. My prediction is we start with all this "local flavor!" and in a couple years they all close up, and we are back to Subway, McDonalds, Panda Express, and Generic Sports Bars.
Probably the earliest I've ever gotten on a flight.
Our first destination...technically even our second destination...was not actually Newark, but DC. Flying in to Reagan National I caught a glimpse of the Capitol and Washington monument, the latter barely visible by the camera.
Unfortunately both times I was on the wrong side for a solid look at DC. There is a weird Masonic temple way out there on the west side.
From the airport as I waited on layover, you can see the Capitol and Washington monument, again. It was a busy terminal, I looked around hoping to by chance run into Jonah Goldberg and shout NO YOU WONT THIS IS A PODCAST at him, but it was not to be. I got a cheap-tasting but not-actually-cheap pepperoni pizza by way of midday luncheon, and put about a half a pound of crushed red pepper on to it to improve it (a trick I first witnessed from a coworker decades ago, an old Korean engineer who obviously thought American food was bland...and I salute him).
Then taking off...again, as I said, facing away from DC...I was noticing the Air Force monument (or whatever it is called, the weird spires in the top of frame here) before thinking oh that's a funny building...and realizing THE PENTAGON was photobombing me.
I realized next to it must be Arlington (later confirmed).
Salem nuclear power plant, as we winged north. Carbon-free power, beloved of environmental activists everywhere! (ha, ha)
So we landed, but not in Newark. In Philadelphia, no less. My grand scheme to make this trip more interesting than a Newark airport hotel conference room was under way. I changed again once off the plane (I had changed into shorts in DC because the terminal was too warm) and went to get my rental car. Once obtained, I put my trust in Googlina, the Google Maps directions lady, and made my way towards the Delaware river area to visit the Independence Seaport Museum.
I was on a tight schedule here and I did not linger long.
If you're more into small riverine craft and the like, this was probably more interesting, but not really why I was here. I exited the museum and walked around the back.
And there she was, the USS Olympia. Dewey's flagship protected cruiser at the Battle of Manila Bay.
It's an old ship, so the design is very much unlike later cruisers of the 20th century.
The woodwork alone was impressive, everything was wood-panelled and looked rather beautiful for a warship. This was the officer's wardroom. Note the medium caliber guns on the side...I guess they let the enlisted men come in and work those during battle...
Closeup of the six pounder...basically a 57mm cannon.
It's beautiful...but honestly, I'd rather have more steel plating on a ship going into harm's way!
Down towards the boilers and engine...
An operating table. Better hope the doc has a steady hand and the ship isn't rocking too much!
Heaven, I'm in heaven
And my heart beats so that I can hardly speak
And I seem to find the happiness I seek
When we're out together pooping cheek to cheek
(seriously guys if we can't have walls then maybe just a little bit of personal space??)
Big fella in a barbette.
Up on deck. There's a sailing ship behind this one.
Either this ship was minimally armoured or this is reconstruction; but in a naval action I would not like to be sitting here protected by, I dunno, a bit of teak.
The slab that brought the Unknown Soldier back, on this ship, from the battlefields of WWI.
Early turret design with 8" guns.
Next door was a submarine that cost extra to tour, and only at certain times, so I didn't tour her, but having a look at her sail and the various sensors and masts...
Across the river...my next stop. Yep, the whole reason I went this far out of way...BB62, the USS New Jersey. The third of the four Iowa battleships for me to visit (USS Wisconsin still eludes me).
Another quick look at the sail, and back to the car.
Driving through downtown (or old town? I dunno) Philadelphia, the architecture was nice, the traffic fraught. I think I actually drove directly next to Liberty Hall, and the Betsy Ross house, but there was no stopping. Eventually I got across the bridge to the Camden, New Jersey side, made my way confusingly towards the waterfront, and eventually found the entrance to the USS New Jersey museum. I briefly lost my wallet and panicked when trying to pay, but found it in one of my jacket pockets eventually and breathed a sigh of relief. Walking up they are always so impressive!
I paid my admission and headed towards the ship. The volunteer who greeted me on the foredeck chatted with me for a while, and after I mentioned the Iowa and Missouri, he rather proudly predicted I would find this one much more open and accessible, and indeed he was right! I could have spent all day here.
First stop, into the forward 16" turret! Some sailor art, basically encompassing the "Vote or Die!" message of that 2004 South Park episode.
These guys aren't even involved in the aiming of the guns, all of that is handled elsewhere (as well as the actual firing)...this is just the loading and general control. It is an extremely heavily armoured rotary bunker basically.
Back on the deck to continue the tour...
Towards the bow of the ship, the anchor hoist.
A ship of this girth has to be pretty steady, but honestly I would've thought maybe the chess pieces would be magnetized or something to keep them flying everywhere. I guess if enemy shells are hitting you've got bigger problems than a loose rook.
The somewhat tight enlisted berths.
Look at this, Olympia...they've got URINAL DIVIDERS. (Can't resist, "do you think urinal dividers take the fun out of urinals? ...these walls..." -Jiminy Glick)
DOWN LADDER MAKE A HOLE
Man if my kids were sailors they would spend all there money here within like 24 hours at sea.
XO computer and library area, I kept looking for a Jane's Fighting Ships but never found one. Maybe they are too valuable to be left aboard ship (they don't tend to be cheap).
Wardroom much bigger on this ship.
Very similar to those of the other Iowas, of course.
Mockups of various projectiles, the furthest one back being an 18" Yamato mockup.
One of my favorite things about these ships in particular is the anachronistic melding of different periods...built in the 40s but revamped in the 80s and retired in the 90s again. So the style is a mix of things, with old original WWII components and old TVs and computers as well.
Here's where the sailors, bored of chess, played backgammon.
And when they bored of THAT they got into cosplay, for crossing the line.
Down to the crew mess the inital tour ends and you get a choice of three more, each with a different color tape on the floor to guide you.
A small chapel for services.
The door was locked to the library but I couldn't see an obvious Jane's Fighting Ships in there, anyway. That fake wood panelling is great!
No grog ration for you sailor, but hot chocolate, sure.
A machine shop for fixing or contriving all manner of parts at sea.
It called this an electronics room but it looked more like electrical work...similar enough.
Loading chute for the 5" guns.
A full service dental office with X-ray and several stalls. Like the supercarriers, albeit less extensive, this was basically a floating city.
I forget but this may have been a PA system related room.
Another operating room.
With an adjoining full service sick bay.
Radio / comms office.
Then I happened on a bored volunteer who offered to extend the tour route for a guided tour of the turret magazine area and the engineering spaces. I was one of very few visitors aboard that day, so I got the private tour! This is looking down into the base of the turret, where you can see the rotating center section that undergirds the turret itself. Powder bags loaded into the central elevators here.
Elevator openings on that central portion.
Then into fire control, where these large mechanical computers existed to calculate fire solutions. I got to pull the trigger (which set off the loud, contrived gunfire noises via speaker)...it's a neat part of the tour, probably especially fun for a kid on the tour.
Here are some of the boilers that create steam to drive the turbines.
One of the massive propeller shafts, that sailors would jump up and try to hold onto while turning, exhibiting all that intelligence and prudence teenagers are known for (see this is why you need that operating room and sick bay).
The turbine, an extremely critical piece of infrastructure...whenever is was opened up for maintenance, a MarDet soldier would stand behind the one doing the work with a rifle, ensuring that if any sabotage was done to it, it would be the last thing that sailor ever did.
Bofors out on the main deck again.
The classic 40mm anti-air defense from the WWII era.
This may have been called the weather bridge? I now don't recall. It has windshield wipers so that'd be a good guess.
This looks more like an "electronics" area. Weller soldering iron and all!
Control room for a small TV studio.
And the TV studio itself.
The CEC (Combat Engagement Center). Similar to a CIC as you'd find on other ships, not sure why they diverged in terminology, maybe additional capabilities of this station over a CIC.
I guess this where you'd want to be stationed if you had sensitive eyes.
NAVIGATOR. HOW LONG TO NEPTUNE MASSHIF
Somebody came up with this slogan, which I'm not sure makes a lot of sense, but hey, you're not paying people to be pithy and creative here.
(I think) the captain's chair.
The heavily armoured conn, just an incredibly massive amount of steel surrounding you in there.
Probably the last map this ship ever needed!
A fire control station on the upper deck.
CIWS, aka R2D2, with the 20mm belt feeding mechanism visible below.
If I had to pick a term for the local area, I might go with "rusty", it has that feel of a town that has seen better days, but hey, it's got a BATTLESHIP your town doesn't have one so SHUT UP
You can also hop into one of the 5 inch turrets!
Like the 16" turrets, you're blind once you are in here to what's going on elsewhere, but just load those guns and let the fire control folks do their job.
My theory on this little section is they taped up what it should have been...and either the ship got decommed before the sailor finished stenciling the message, or something. But I was gonna say...I mean...speaking as one who had ambitions at being a naval officer (and none towards going enlisted), sometimes officers are kind of assholes, haha. But then I think about what a bunch of 18 year old kids stuck on a boat together would be acting like and I think, OK, this is 100% justified. Shaddup kids.
Barbershop.
The Brig, for naughty sailors.
Damage control station. Those giant corks are funny, but practical...you need to plug a hole, hammer one of those babies in.
I think this may be a senior chief lounge or wardroom equivalent.
Looks comfortable enough, for senior NCOs.
Back up on deck and making my way out.
Noted a spare 16" tube outside.
It's a big one!
No snarky political point to make here, just kind of interesting to note as things change...it used to be the Martin Luther King Junior Street thing was how a city might profess solidarity with civil rights movements, and now we have a new option, that I hadn't seen before. Making my way out of Camden.
I hit the turnpike and drove up through New Jersey for an hour and a half, towards Newark and New York. Finally landed in Newark airport area, paid my toll, and turned in my rental after gassing it up. I took the airtram from the rental location to the spot in the airport where you wait for shuttle hotels. New York skyline visible from the tram.
You could walk easily to the hotel which is central to the airport, but for a lack of safe road crossings from there. I waited for the shuttle and eventually got to my hotel.
Once settled in I ordered delivery from a taqueria and got an al pastor taco and an alambre, with chips and a very spicy, thin, arbol style salsa. I then relaxed with some DCS dogfighting videos and called it a night.
I won't bore you...nor myself...with details of the conference over the next few days. It was like the conference always is, useful for me professionally. I left a bit early on the second day to make my way back to the airport for a 5pm flight. From there I was winging it up to Detroit for another layover. At this point in the flight we were technically over Canada, which doesn't count as visiting, but hey, Canadian airspace for the first time.
As we swung south of Detroit to make our landing, spotted another nuclear reactor. Save the Earth, build advanced fission reactors!
After an hour layover where I basically just say my ass down (I did not explore the Detroit airport) we were off and winging it homewards again.
My trick WORKED again. Ask for tonic water, they don't want to split it up, they just give you the can. My PATENTED MOVE
I got home, with a scary-seeming "instruments only" approach to the runway in thick fog/clouds (cleared up just as we got within a few hundred feet of the ground though), went and painlessly retrieved my car, and headed home, picking up some dinner on the way and happy to see Debra again (the kids were asleep). While I didn't bring these gifts with me for the kids, they were shipped and timed to arrive the next day, conveniently, so Pete got a demented lagomorph and Gretchen a burrito cat. It was a fun trip!
